Mormon Doctrine.net Girlmama's Testimony

Biblical Reasons Ministry

A Testimony Out of Mormonism & Turned to Christ

In high school it was a given that we would take LDS seminary. The LDS seminary program (which is for grades nine through 12) has a main focus for each year (at least it did when I went through). My freshman year was Doctrine and Covenants. Sophomore year focused on the Book of Mormon. Junior year was spent studying the Old Testament and Senior year was the New Testament.

My senior year I got so involved in the Gospels that I would read them all of the time. I would even ditch classes to go study (kind of an interesting thing to do while skipping school, but whatever). I remember once being asked by another LDS person what my favorite book of scripture was and when I answered “The New Testament” I got this look like I had just blasphemed or something (every good member of the LDS church should answer either the BOM or the D&C). He didn’t know what to say to that. I explained that I loved to read the words of Jesus in the Gospels and his reply was that I should read 3rd Nephi. It’s been a long time since I’ve read the Book of Mormon, but I think that’s where it claims Jesus appeared on the American continent (maybe South America? I’m not sure).

One afternoon, I don’t know the date or even the month, though I think it was late winter, I was in my bedroom and the weight of my sins was heavy on me. That afternoon the conviction of all I had done in my life was so strong that I felt like I would be crushed under the weight of my sins. I felt tormented and enveloped by the ugliness of my sin. I could go on and on trying to describe the evilness of what I felt, quite honestly I believe I have felt Hell. There really is no other way to describe how awful it was. It was as though the physical pain caused by the sins I had committed could actually take my life. I was lying on the floor at this point and the world seemed dark around me. I had a basement bedroom, but it felt the darkness was coming from within my soul. I remember crying out to God, “They say I need to talk to a Bishop to be forgiven, but can’t you just forgive me yourself? I think you can.” And at that very moment I had a very physical feeling of the once crushing weight being removed from me and at the same moment my room filled with the brightest light I had ever experienced, though it was bright without being blinding. I can’t actually say that it was a literal light because I do not remember if my eyes were opened or closed at that time, but I suppose it doesn’t matter much. All that really mattered was that I knew at that moment I was forgiven.

On the side: It was a few years before I became aware of the true nature of the LDS faith. I spent a lot of time trying to find in the LDS church the God that I had met in my bedroom. Without much success, eventually I gave up altogether. God is faithful though and he never did leave me.

Learning the truth of the LDS church came after a lot of study on the Internet visiting sites like Matthew Slick’s CARM and the Tanner’s Utah Lighthouse Ministry. It seems like there were a couple of others, but all of my links for those are on the old computer that I don’t have access to at this time. I cross-referenced their claims against the LDS church, reading from LDS teaching manuals, misc. books, the Journal of Discourses, and even the Book of Mormon, Pearl of Great Price and Doctrine & Covenants.

Forgive me, I know this is getting long, but I wanted to add a little story from the time I was most heavily involved in my studying. I had read that Temple Square is filled with all sorts of pagan and even plain evil symbols. I wanted to go see them for myself because I had spent a large amount of time at Temple Square during my senior year of high school (I would study and pray there a lot, especially while trying to find God again after that day in my room). Most often I would go to the North Visitor’s Center and sit in front of the Christus statue.

Doug and I, along with Doug’s brother’s wife, went one day. I was almost shaking and very nervous. We walked around the outside of the Temple noting the symbols there. We went into the North Visitor’s Center and walked up the spiral, winding hallway leading to the second floor. I couldn’t find the inverted, elongated pentagrams that I had read were located somewhere in that room. After a few minutes Doug got my attention, pointing to the planter boxes at the ends of the benches placed in front of a statue made to represent Jesus. I felt sick. How many hours had I spent sitting there praying? There on those benches, with the pentagrams at my sides, not even knowing?

I sat down. Sad. I let my gaze fall upon the statue that I had seen so often as a teenager, and even as a child. The image I had once found to be strong and comforting appeared weak and fragile, as if the slightest touch would cause it to crumble to the ground, shattered.

Although it was not audible, I heard God speak to me at that moment saying, “This is not me. I am not here.”

~girlmama

Jesus Saves

Mormon Testimonies Turned to Christ
Updated 5.08

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"Jesus' blood on the altar was the ultimate payment. He made us worthy permanently. When Jesus died on the cross the veil covering the Holy of Holies tore in half. The mercy seat lay exposed to mankind. There is no veil, anymore, between God and man. Jesus ripped it down. But Mormonism has hung up a new one." -Kathleen Baldwin

"When I was LDS (not that long ago) I saw a lot of things that made me question my membership in the LDS church, but I sure wouldn't admit it for a long time (not even to myself). I just knew there had to be good explanations for all of those silly criticisms, if I just looked in the right place...or prayed about it long enough. I was wrong." - Former Mormon, Marsha Bette More...

Editor's note:
If the quote above describes you, please know that God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life. Visit Testimonies Turned to Christ at the top of this section to understand that you're not alone in your feelings.

Biblical Reasons Ministry




	A Testimony Out of Mormonism & Turned to Christ by Girlmama allgirlsmama@yahoo.com In high school it was a given that we would take LDS seminary. The LDS seminary program (which is for grades nine through 12) has a main focus for each year (at least it did when I went through). My freshman year was Doctrine and Covenants. Sophomore year focused on the Book of Mormon. Junior year was spent studying the Old Testament and Senior year was the New Testament. My senior year I got so involved in the Gospels that I would read them all of the time. I would even ditch classes to go study (kind of an interesting thing to do while skipping school, but whatever). I remember once being asked by another LDS person what my favorite book of scripture was and when I answered “The New Testament” I got this look like I had just blasphemed or something (every good member of the LDS church should answer either the BOM or the D&C). He didn’t know what to say to that. I explained that I loved to read the words of Jesus in the Gospels and his reply was that I should read 3rd Nephi. It’s been a long time since I’ve read the Book of Mormon, but I think that’s where it claims Jesus appeared on the American continent (maybe South America? I’m not sure). One afternoon, I don’t know the date or even the month, though I think it was late winter, I was in my bedroom and the weight of my sins was heavy on me. That afternoon the conviction of all I had done in my life was so strong that I felt like I would be crushed under the weight of my sins. I felt tormented and enveloped by the ugliness of my sin. I could go on and on trying to describe the evilness of what I felt, quite honestly I believe I have felt Hell. There really is no other way to describe how awful it was. It was as though the physical pain caused by the sins I had committed could actually take my life. I was lying on the floor at this point and the world seemed dark around me. I had a basement bedroom, but it felt the darkness was coming from within my soul. I remember crying out to God, “They say I need to talk to a Bishop to be forgiven, but can’t you just forgive me yourself? I think you can.” And at that very moment I had a very physical feeling of the once crushing weight being removed from me and at the same moment my room filled with the brightest light I had ever experienced, though it was bright without being blinding. I can’t actually say that it was a literal light because I do not remember if my eyes were opened or closed at that time, but I suppose it doesn’t matter much. All that really mattered was that I knew at that moment I was forgiven. On the side: It was a few years before I became aware of the true nature of the LDS faith. I spent a lot of time trying to find in the LDS church the God that I had met in my bedroom. Without much success, eventually I gave up altogether. God is faithful though and he never did leave me. Learning the truth of the LDS church came after a lot of study on the Internet visiting sites like Matthew Slick’s CARM and the Tanner’s Utah Lighthouse Ministry. It seems like there were a couple of others, but all of my links for those are on the old computer that I don’t have access to at this time. I cross-referenced their claims against the LDS church, reading from LDS teaching manuals, misc. books, the Journal of Discourses, and even the Book of Mormon, Pearl of Great Price and Doctrine & Covenants. Forgive me, I know this is getting long, but I wanted to add a little story from the time I was most heavily involved in my studying. I had read that Temple Square is filled with all sorts of pagan and even plain evil symbols. I wanted to go see them for myself because I had spent a large amount of time at Temple Square during my senior year of high school (I would study and pray there a lot, especially while trying to find God again after that day in my room). Most often I would go to the North Visitor’s Center and sit in front of the Christus statue. Doug and I, along with Doug’s brother’s wife, went one day. I was almost shaking and very nervous. We walked around the outside of the Temple noting the symbols there. We went into the North Visitor’s Center and walked up the spiral, winding hallway leading to the second floor. I couldn’t find the inverted, elongated pentagrams that I had read were located somewhere in that room. After a few minutes Doug got my attention, pointing to the planter boxes at the ends of the benches placed in front of a statue made to represent Jesus. I felt sick. How many hours had I spent sitting there praying? There on those benches, with the pentagrams at my sides, not even knowing? I sat down. Sad. I let my gaze fall upon the statue that I had seen so often as a teenager, and even as a child. The image I had once found to be strong and comforting appeared weak and fragile, as if the slightest touch would cause it to crumble to the ground, shattered. Although it was not audible, I heard God speak to me at that moment saying, “This is not me. I am not here.” ~girlmama	Jesus Saves Mormon Testimonies Turned to Christ Updated 5.08 Home Articles Did They Really Say That? Why Mormonism? Mormon Temples Secret or Sacred? What Happens In There? The Mormon Miracle Pageant An LDS Wedding Story Photo Album Christian Encouragement Four Spiritual Laws That’s my King! (S M Lockridge) – free video Lighter Side Statement of Faith Offsite Links Miscellaneous Contact Class Outlines Donate "Jesus' blood on the altar was the ultimate payment. He made us worthy permanently. When Jesus died on the cross the veil covering the Holy of Holies tore in half. The mercy seat lay exposed to mankind. There is no veil, anymore, between God and man. Jesus ripped it down. But Mormonism has hung up a new one." -Kathleen Baldwin "When I was LDS (not that long ago) I saw a lot of things that made me question my membership in the LDS church, but I sure wouldn't admit it for a long time (not even to myself). I just knew there had to be good explanations for all of those silly criticisms, if I just looked in the right place...or prayed about it long enough. I was wrong." - Former Mormon, Marsha Bette More... Editor's note: If the quote above describes you, please know that God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life. Visit Testimonies Turned to Christ at the top of this section to understand that you're not alone in your feelings.